Excerpt from The Survivor's Voice: Healing the Invisible Wounds of Violence and Abuse

by Kathy Manis Findley

The persons who tell their stories in these pages open before us the private, sacred ground of their lives in relationship to the lives of those closest to them. They are persons who endured the terror of violence and abuse within the most cherished of their relationships, in the place that should have been a haven of safety, in their own homes. They have known long nights of the soul and of the spirit, and have learned fear from those who should have loved them.

I know them as sisters and brothers who understand my own midnights of the soul. I know them as companions who, like me, cried out during endless nights of despair, and who eventually experienced the indignity of silenced voices. I have wept with them and walked with them. I have worked with them and agonized with them. We have traveled together through times that were darker than a thousand midnights. We have uttered for one another prayers of deep gratitude when the dawn finally came and we could see the day breaking into the joy of morning.

The names in these stories, the places and details and relationships, are clothed in enough obscurity to protect the privacy of all persons involved. Each account is true, and the detail of each story is accurate. I wish these stories were fictionalized accounts. I wish the events described in this book had never happened. The harsh truth is that every narrative I have retold in these pages did happen. The most tragic of truths is that every narrative I have retold happens many times over--every day, in many places, and in all kinds of homes--to countless other mourners.

My personal stories, which are interspersed in the "voices" chapters, emerge out of the absolute realities of my own childhood. I could have given many more details that might have served to sensationalize the truth. The details I did include, however, are sufficient to describe the environment of my childhood and adolescence and my emotional responses to that environment. More specific retelling of my own story of family violence and abuse would have likely caused pain to family members and others who would have found themselves in the story. I have chosen to avoid this out of love and respect for them.

Kathy Manis Findley is the author of "The Survivor's Voice", published by Smyth & Helwys Publishing. To order, go to the online bookpage or call 1-800-747-3016.

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