Time hangs like a curse or a blessing over retirement. Which one it will be for you depends on whether you let time liberate you—or enslave you.
We become enslaved when we are preoccupied with how things used to be, whom we used to know, what we used to do, where we used to go.
We are enslaved by memory when we feel that everything that’s gone before is lost, never to be regained, like part of us is missing.

We are enslaved when, facing God’s big deadline, we begin to think of ourselves and refer to ourselves as old and focus our attention on the physical activities our bodies no longer let us do.

We are liberated when we see ourselves as an accumulation of all the experiences, bad and good, we’ve ever had, all the people we’ve ever known, all the things we’ve ever done—and when we see that none of it is lost but rather has been part of the great adventure that nurtured us into who we are today.

We are liberated when we accept the infirmities of aging while maintaining the attitude that, in Gertrude Stein’s words, “we are always the same age inside,” and that we can imbue our lives with even more meaning now than ever before. On the surface, it’s easy enough to intellectualize this attitude, but it’s something else again to embrace with our minds and spirits the full potential of the rest of our lives.

In interviewing people for this book, I heard one comment so often I began to feel it must be typical of people who are about fifty years old. Again and again, they referred to the “second half” of their lives. It’s the big joke: there are “half-time” parties, people talk about being on the “downhill” side, and so on.

Clearly, age fifty is not the halfway point; it’s the two-thirds point for most people. So why the focus on midpoint? Easy enough to explain: It’s our human attempt at lightheartedness, even bravado, in the face of inevitable aging and death.

There’s another way to approach it, however, and that is to realize that, symbolically, we have indeed reached only the halfway point at fifty, or perhaps even older. If we choose the attitude of liberation about the rest of our lives, then it is altogether possible that the final one-third of life can be as rich and full and as emotionally and spiritually rewarding as the first two-thirds, perhaps more so.

The people whose stories appear in this book are inspiring examples of that attitude. In several cases, they chose liberation despite episodes of serious illness and disability. When I first began to look for these stories, I figured I could create a list of categories that would serve as chapter titles, and then find people whose stories fit the categories.

It has turned out that most of the people who are involved in one activity or interest or area of personal growth are also involved in others. I should have known. After all, it would be impossible to fit my own story into one of those arbitrary categories. I do a little bit of almost all of them.

In fact, my life since retirement has been so rich and fulfilling that I’ve come to feel that everything I’ve ever done has conspired to bring me to where I am now. But until very recent years, I did not seriously consider how this phase of life would be. I grew up without any concept whatsoever of retirement.

I come from farm people and country preachers, and I’m not sure I ever heard the word retirement before I went away to college. Old Mr. So-and-So might have become “too old to work,” as it was said. And in every community there were a few of those “old folks” who generally spent their days sitting and, when visitors came, telling stories of the old days. But no one called it retirement.

So I entered the world of work never expecting to retire, only to find myself taking early retirement eleven years ago.

As long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to be an author, but because other things, mainly my career, kept interfering, my first book—written in my “spare time”—wasn’t published until I was fifty. Now in retirement, I write almost every day. There has been one surprise, however: writers not only write, they speak. So I find myself speaking to all kinds of groups, profit and nonprofit, secular and religious, seasoned professionals and students.

The most rewarding thing I can think of is to be published, to be read, and then to be invited to share my experiences and insights personally. Beyond those rewards are the ones that come from my coaching and counseling of executives and managers, as well as the conflict mediation and resolution I have regularly been called upon to do. I’ve also counseled and advised people about career changes and retirement.

All these experiences—speaking, coaching, counseling, advising, and writing—have led in one way or another to what I offer on these pages. In writing this book, I hope simply to share with you the thoughts, observations, advice, and information I’ve shared face to face over the past several years with many clients, colleagues, and friends.

In addition, I think you’ll be inspired by the wonderful, exemplary stories I’ve chosen of people who are shining examples of an attitude of liberation. Their stories, along with the information and reference material in each chapter, are intended to help you in your own journey toward retirement or, if you’ve already retired, to help you imbue your life with meaning, purpose, and personal and spiritual growth.

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