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Book Excerpt
Blessed Are the Jesus Chicks Chapter 1 - Juggling Act in Progress, Proceed with Caution
Like most women today, I have become an expert juggler. I hold a skillet in one hand, a diaper bag in the other, and anticipate catching the next work project that is suddenly flying toward me, all while balancing on a great big ball of guilt. I’ve gotten pretty good at keeping all the objects in the air—because if I drop one, then my family suffers along with me. Life is not easy for the mom who works outside the home, and perhaps it’s even a touch harder for the Christian woman who wants desperately to keep everyone pleased, especially the Lord. I’ll never forget the first moment I held each of my precious babies in my arms. “God, thank you for loaning me this child to raise for you,” I prayed. “Just don’t let me screw it up.” Stroking their tiny fingers, I was filled with awe, humility, and dread. For weeks after both my sons’ births, I clung to my mother’s pants legs, fearing she would leave me alone with this tiny, helpless creature. Despite that I was a grown woman, a college graduate, and a professional with a loving husband at my side, I was petrified that I would be unable to meet my children’s needs. That pretty much sums up my outlook on life—fearful that I will make a mistake. Mom eventually left, and, guess what, nobody died. I bathed my children by myself, fed them, cuddled them, and played with them. You know what else? I was pretty good at it. Women are pressured to do so much that we often become paralyzed by the responsibility, just as I was with my boys. We want to be June Cleaver, nurturing our families with a smile and a perfect outfit, but realize we must also be Mary Tyler Moore, successful career woman. How do we make everyone happy and maintain our Christian perspective? It’s a delicate balance that would challenge even the most talented juggler. I’ve got news for you, ladies. No matter how skilled you are at keeping all the balls airborne, chances are you’re eventually going to drop one. But, as long as no one’s dead or dying as a result, you are going to survive. No one can walk a tightrope without practice. Even then, there’s usually a safety net to cushion the fall if you miss a step or two. In the Christian world, we call this grace. This book is meant to provide my fellow Christian moms with insight that will inspire you to embrace your life, in every aspect, without fearing certain doom. But you’ll also learn to trust those around you so that when you do falter, you can fall into the waiting arms of your supporters. The truth is, this world and everything in it is temporary. If we live in fear of every decision, bearing the weight of the world on our shoulders, we will never fully experience joy. Wouldn’t it be a shame to end up on our deathbeds suddenly aware that all our fretting was pointless? How much time will we waste biting our nails and wringing our hands rather than relishing each moment? The best way to move into the future is to look at the past. Women who came before us in the Old Testament weren’t merely wives or simply mothers. They, too, had professions alongside these other important aspects of daily existence. We will examine these female leaders of biblical history. From them, we can learn about claiming our place in society with pride. These women also struggled, but, thanks to such renowned contributors as Ruth Graham and LeTourneau University’s professor of biblical studies, Dr. Renata Hood, we’ll be able to see how those centuries-old struggles relate to our own. As written in Ecclesiastes 1:9, we’ll see that there really is “nothing new under the sun.” If that isn’t enough to convince you that you’re not alone in your daily quest for sanity, I’ll share stories of real-life working moms who will uplift and inspire you. (We all know that stay-at-home moms work as hard as folks in the workplace, but for simplicity’s sake, I will use the term “working mom” to refer to mothers with jobs outside the home.) These remarkable ladies are people just like you and me. There’s no set demographic. Some are rich, some are poor. Some are single mothers struggling to make it, and others are married and trying to stay connected with a spouse in the midst of so many other responsibilities. I met a few of these women during my work in the ministry, and their unique and interesting ways of dealing with day-to-day challenges have spurred me onward. Many of these women have persevered through great loss, always maintaining their faith, making them remarkable role models for any working Christian, woman or man. Childcare throughout biblical times is another topic I found interesting and worthy of sharing. You’ll be amazed at how much pressure today’s mom puts on herself versus that of the historical mom. The woman from Proverbs 31 whom we hold in such high esteem had help, a nanny if you will, as did most women of her day. In the Greco-Roman period, which is demonstrated through the New Testament, maidservants were common in most households. Domestic help was a necessity more than a luxury (a fact that unfortunately still fails to persuade my husband to hire a maid). Compared to our historical sisters, modern-day women are super overachievers; it’s no wonder we’re buying Xanax in record numbers. By looking at ancient childcare practices, we’ll be able to see how women long ago distributed some of the weight to other resources. What can we learn from their culture to help us be as productive as the Proverbs woman of noble character? We’ll discuss ways to adapt to life after baby, such as easing back into the workforce and championing your cause for a more family-friendly work environment. America has yet to catch up to the growing needs of working moms. But you have more power over this issue than you might think. Perhaps God is calling you to rally for a nursing room or an on-site daycare. Maybe it’s as simple as discussing breast-milk storage or flexible hours. Whatever the need, you can raise the issue using tact, honesty, and a sense of humor. We all need to know our limits, set boundaries, and make those limits and boundaries work for us. Going back to work as a new mom means entering a world different from that of your previous working life. This book provides tools to help the Christian working mother deal with those struggles, such as avoiding the pitfalls of naysayers, judgmental peers, and personal over-commitment so you can enjoy a full and enriching life that fully embraces your working-mom status. Chapter 3 will help you critically review your extracurricular activities, which often threaten the work/life balance. Each of us must sort through a mound of commitments. I want to challenge every woman who reads this to examine that mound, remove what is unnecessary, and replace it with a more fulfilling experience. It’s time to look at the messy garage of our cluttered calendar and give some things away. We’re going to go through our PDAs, Daytimers, or online planners and scrap what we don’t absolutely need. It’s time to clean house. If you don’t find joy in a particular event, if the very idea of attending a specific meeting makes your palms sweat and your heart palpitate, it’s likely not doing you any good. Of course, letting go may not be easy. It’s difficult to pry long-held activities from our clenched fists. Some of us may even shed a few tears. But trust me. You’ll be glad you cleared away the mess. And, just like those size 0 gold pants you finally threw away during last year’s spring cleaning binge, you won’t even notice when these things are gone. Instead you will experience relief and a new sense of roominess in your life that you haven’t felt in a long time. As you read this book, imagine your life as a toolbox. Before any useful tools can be placed inside, the box must be open. I urge every reader to unlock the latch and get ready to add what you need. Then keep that box open so the new instruments are easily accessible when you need them. This one book will certainly not solve all your problems. What it will do, however, is introduce you to some new gadgets and gizmos that, if used properly, could make your life a bit easier. Let’s face it: none of us will ever be free of the surging liquid of life, but when our cup overflows we eventually have to clean up the mess. This book provides the tools to help us tidy up a bit. Questions 1. List five areas of your life as a working mom that you wish to improve. 2. What do you hope to gain from this book? 3. List prayer needs for yourself and your family. Remember them in your daily quiet time. 4. How well do you think you handle the juggling act now? Where do you think you need the most improvement? 5. Rate yourself as a parent between 1 and 10, with 10 being the highest score. Later in the book, we’ll evaluate your rating. _________ |
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